"It is a pretty mocking of life"

Satire. One word, but a strong and important one at that.

I have always seen satire as something that is detrimentally vital in every aspect of life. Ever since reading Swift's "A Modest Proposal" I was completely immersed in a world that holds the real world accountable. That's so important. I contend that everything -- to a pragmatic extent -- should be held accountable. Like blogs. (See my tirade about apathy towards spelling, grammar, honesty, etc. about blogging). Case in point.

Anyway, I have recently been working on a satirical piece about Wikipedia. There is always a lot of truth in satire, and I think that kinda comes through in this piece. And the abstruse language? I think it is important to be clear and concise with one's writing (something I am always fighting with), but with satire, it is part of the appeal to write articulate, high-echelon material. John Oldham said it so eloquently: "I hold my pen as others do their sword. To each affronting sot I meet, the word is satisfaction: straight to thrusts I go, and pointed satire runs him through and through."

Anyway, enough drivel. Here's the piece, titled, "Come together, right now, over Wikipedia":

When Thomas More was creating his masterpiece, Utopia, he forgot to mention one crucial appendage: Wikipedia.

            It’s inarguable as to what Wikipedia truly is; Jimmy Wales, Wikipedia’s founder, said it best with laconic words, “Free access to all human knowledge.” That’s right, “free” access to the world’s most valuable resource next to money, knowledge. And we all know how powerful knowledge is, and if not, just look to the axiom, “knowledge is power.” That specific adage was actually created by Sir Francis Bacon – case in point.

            Wikipedia has aptly stated the truth on the macro level: “You can help Wikipedia change the world!” In other words: this is your chance people to make that difference that you are always musing about. For instance, if you (and 99 other people) donate to the all-powerful Wikipedia a mere $200 (equivalent to a day at the spa) you can make Wikipedia available in developing countries with “DVDs, books and pamphlets.” Moreover, if you (and 99 other people) donate $100 (a swanky steak dinner for two) to Wikipedia you can bring about “two Wikipedia Academy events in Africa.”

            Now, let’s deconstruct this notion that Wikipedia can change the world. Firstly, Wikipedia brings everyone in the world together (that has access to the Internet) in the pursuit of the aforementioned knowledge. For instance, Wikipedia is the ninth most-visited website on the Internet with 42.9 million unique visitors, according to Wikipedia. Talking about pursuit of knowledge – Wikipedia has more visitors than The New York Times. Secondly, Wikipedia is utterly inclusive, making its knowledge available in a myriad of other languages, such as Česky and Hrvatski for most articles (that’s more inclusive that the UN and NATO combined). Thirdly, Wikipedia contains the most arcane knowledge out there, which emphasizes its sheer erudition. Not sure what the landmass of Togo is; unsure of whom Jean-Baptiste van Loo really was; forgot the date of the guillotine’s retirement? Don’t fret, just check out the unerring Wikipedia.

            Like all other pursuits for world peace, however, there are a few infidels that try to ruin the infallible behemoth that is Wikipedia. Dissidents, which try to destroy Wikipedia’s credibility by fabricating knowledge is reason enough to reintroduce the guillotine.

            In the end, I agree with Socrates’ intuition: “Opinions divorced from Wikipedia are ugly.” So it’s up to, do you want to change the world?

NOTE: All research for this article was completed on the omnipotent Wikipedia.